These dating sites are actually good for finding a serious relationship

Who it's for:

Sick and tired of mindless swiping and superficial connections? eHarmony(opens in a new tab) might be the dating platform you're looking for. If you're ready to ditch the casual flings and dive headfirst into a meaningful relationship, it may be worth signing up.

This platform is tailor-made for those who refuse to settle for anything less than a lifelong partner. If you're longing to hear wedding bells and walk down the aisle, eharmony is your trusty wingmate. It provides a safe space for singles who value commitment, compatibility, and shared values in their search for "the one." Say goodbye to the endless sea of profiles and hello to a purposeful dating experience.

Why we picked this:

You know those cheesy eharmony commercials with couples frolicking in fields and gazing into each other's eyes? As cringe-worthy as they may be, they actually do work. A spokesperson for the site says it's been used by 54 million people and is responsible for 4 percent of U.S. marriages. That doesn't mean you'll walk down the aisle within the first year, but it at least narrows your options to singles open to being exclusive, meeting the family, or moving in together.

While the sign-up process was once a bit of a drag, eharmony has streamlined it to be short, sweet, and free of the cheesy, religious questions that held it back from being a top choice for the younger crowd. The 80 questions(opens in a new tab) cover 32 dimensions of what makes a happy relationship, from communication style to gender roles. It's not your typical dating app questionnaire, either. Instead of asking if you're "emotionally stable," eHarmony may ask how you handle apologizing after a fight or if a particular action would tick you off. The hypothetical scenarios feel more natural and provide a better sense of what you're all about. And while 80 questions may sound daunting, it only takes around 20 minutes to complete.

It's worth noting that eHarmony has faced criticism in the past for not welcoming members of the LGBTQ+ community. Though they folded their gay and lesbian spin-off site into the overall platform in 2010, Reddit users as recently as 2019 claimed the site still seems geared more toward straight people. It wasn't until a year ago that eharmony finally updated its interface to allow bisexual users to view profiles of both men and women.

Read our review of eharmony.

Who it's for:

Match is the ultimate dating platform for singles ready to take their dating journey seriously, but without the immediate expectation of marriage. It caters to individuals who prioritize building meaningful connections and seek long-term relationships based on shared values and relationship goals.

With match, you can explore a vast pool of like-minded individuals looking for genuine connections. Whether you're seeking companionship, a committed partnership, or a future life partner, match gives you the tools and features to help you discover, meet, and connect with potential partners who align with your aspirations.

Why we picked this:

Match (no "dot com") has earned its place as a top choice for those seeking long-term relationships. With its decades-long presence in the dating industry since its launch in 1995, match brings a wealth of experience and reliability to the table, instilling confidence in singles who may be hesitant about online dating.

Match continuously solidifies itself as a well-rounded choice for all ages because it refuses to get lost in the antiquated, corny trope. Its questionnaire has evolved to focus on shared interests, important factors like pet preferences, desire for children, and dealbreakers such as smoking or drinking. By prioritizing these key aspects, match helps users find compatible matches that align with their values and lifestyle.

Most of us would like to believe that anyone paying over $20 per month is serious, but match has had its fair share of extreme catfishing(opens in a new tab). But they're working to make this better: Match is set to follow Tinder as the second Match Group app(opens in a new tab) to utilize location-based emergency services via Noonlight and photo verification to authenticate faces with real humans. They've also partnered with Garbo(opens in a new tab), a background check platform, which allows all users two free checks and premium users four free checks.

Though it does have a bit of a history, these days, Match is one of the less bot- and hookup-heavy websites, as having most features behind a paywall tends to attract daters looking for commitment. 

Read our review of Match.

Read our full review of AdultFriendFinder.

Who it's for:

OkCupid is designed for individuals who prioritize social justice, equality, and progressive ideals in their search for love and meaningful connections. With robust profile customization options, users can proudly display their political affiliations, causes they support, and social issues they're passionate about.

Why we picked this:

For young, progressive singles, politics aren't just a "well, if we agree, it's great" thing when looking for a partner — it's the make or break for a solid romantic foundation. OkCupid's 2017 redesign is more than just millennial aesthetics (though navigating their website and app is super easy): It's geared toward ensuring that you don't end up on a date with someone who doesn't pay attention. With a wide range of gender identities, sexual orientations, and pronoun options, OkCupid provides an inclusive space for non-binary and queer individuals to find love and express their authentic selves.

Users can weed out people they'd fight with on Facebook by answering inquiries like "Would you date someone who keeps a gun in the house?" or "Should the government require children to be vaccinated for preventable diseases?" In June 2020, the site introduced a Black Lives Matter badge for your profile and in May 2021, a vaccination badge.

OkCupid makes it easy for users to gauge compatibility by displaying the percentage of shared responses to questions. Even free users can access some of OkCupid's best features, ensuring that individuals can connect with others who have put in the effort and are serious about finding meaningful connections. And you can say goodbye to swiping through faceless profiles, as OkCupid requires users to have actual photos of their faces, setting a baseline for genuine interactions.

Read our full review of OkCupid.

Who it's for:

While other apps may prioritize swiping and instant gratification, Hinge sets itself apart with its unique profile criteria and algorithm, paving the way for long-term potential.

By covering important bases right from the start, Hinge increases the likelihood of meeting someone who aligns with your values and interests. It's a refreshing departure from the superficiality of swiping culture, focusing instead on fostering genuine connections.

Why we picked this:

Young people looking to at least go on a few dates with the same person before staying the night was a major blind spot for dating sites — until Hinge blew up. The general appeal might be in the same realm as Tinder and Bumble, but Hinge's unique profile criteria and algorithms based on that criteria set the scene for long-term potential. By covering so many bases before the first message, Hinge lowers the chance of meeting someone you'd hate.

The app's motto, "designed to be deleted," reflects its commitment to helping users find genuine connections and potentially find someone worth leaving the app for. Hinge's real-world statistics(opens in a new tab) speak for themselves, with many users reporting great first dates and expressing interest in second dates.

Hinge's success can be attributed to its emphasis on personal prompts and encouraging users to put effort into their profiles and conversations. Instead of mindless swiping, Hinge encourages individuals to showcase their personalities, engage in thoughtful conversations, and be more intentional in their selections. By limiting the number of likes per day, Hinge motivates users to be more selective and invest time and effort into potential matches. Plus, the app's sections for dating intentions and relationship types allow users to indicate their level of seriousness and interest in non-monogamy so you can specify what you're looking for from the get-go.

Who it's for:

EliteSingles caters to singles who value quality over quantity. It's ideal for those ready for a serious, long-term commitment and looking to connect with someone on a deeper level.

At EliteSingles, compatibility is key. The site uses a sophisticated matchmaking algorithm that considers your personality traits, interests, and relationship preferences to match you with compatible partners. It's a community of individuals who value intelligence, career success, and personal growth, making it an ideal choice for those who want to find a partner who shares their values and aspirations.

Why we picked this:

The great part about online dating is that it gives you the chance to meet a whole pool of people you wouldn't otherwise. But it only takes dating one person with completely different professional goals to make you realize that a relationship can't stay afloat on romance alone and that maybe that pool of people might be a bit too wide.

For those unwilling to budge when it comes to their partner's educational values and passion for success, EliteSingles attempts to create a space where you can find a range of people who you know off the bat share similar values when it comes to your professional life. The site's claim to fame is that 82 percent of members are college grads (most being between the age of 33 and 50). This is the place for folks who have hit a comfortable stride professionally and are now pursuing a partner who's at the same point in their life. The site's questionnaire decodes 29 personality traits to suggest matches who not only have an income compatible with yours, but with whom you'd mesh based on communication styles, ideal first dates, and whether you're one to make the first move.

Past users report a feed full of people who live way farther away than they indicated in their preferences, which is borderline ironic considering the whole conceit of the site is about showing you a specific pool of daters. Plus, the lowest distance you can filter your search to is 50 miles away, so there is built-in leeway for the reality that looking for a more specific type of person may require you to expand your physical location horizons some. And unfortunately, it's hard for any dating website to catch everyone who's lying about their job or income.

Read our review of EliteSingles.

Who it's for:

HER is a dating app and social community designed exclusively for LGBTQ+ women and non-binary individuals.

Whether you're looking for love, friendship, or simply a sense of belonging, HER provides a safe and supportive environment to express yourself authentically. From engaging in conversations in their active community forums to discovering local LGBTQ+ events, HER goes beyond traditional dating apps to foster a sense of community and empower you to be your truest self.

Why we picked this:

Apps like Tinder and Bumble are technically for *everyone,* but they'll be damned if they don't sneak some male profiles into feeds belonging to people who requested otherwise. Given the existence of Grindr and Scruff, the need for an online dating arena specifically for queer women was clear — thus, HER. 

The founders of the award-winning app are committed to cultivating a space that’s “so ragingly queer(opens in a new tab)" that frustrated women can delete apps that don't feel like home. As the user base of over 4 million grows, HER could widen your dating pool beyond the queer women you already know. As the app grows, users online have complained that there does seem to be an increase in bot accounts, so if you do come across a profile that seems suspiciously sparse, you'll want to remain wary.

Still, HER remains the main app solely for queer women. Users can get creative in profile building with categories like diet preferences (like veganism), and star signs, as well as a "What does this mean?" field in the sex, gender, and pronoun categories to supply a more well-rounded understanding of identity. 

The traditional text bio is where you can flex your sense of humor or describe what kind of relationship you're seeking. Joining niche groups like "newly out" or "travelers" can introduce you to people using the app for similar reasons. The app also has a social media component for you to check out events going on in the queer community, either local to you or online, so you can make connections beyond romance. In addition to matching with people, you can also add them as friends if you're the type that likes to start things platonically and see where they go. To make your intentions about something serious clear (and know where others may lie), you can also fill out the "Looking For" section.

Who it's for:

If you're tired of the traditional gender dynamics often found in dating apps, Bumble provides a refreshing alternative. It's a platform where women and non-binary individuals can make the first move and initiate meaningful connections.

Whether you're seeking romance, friendship, or networking opportunities, Bumble offers a user-friendly interface and innovative features to empower you to navigate the dating scene on your terms.

Why we picked this:

In the world of dating apps, Bumble stands out as a refreshing alternative to the chaotic swiping culture. We've all encountered serial swipers, mindlessly liking every profile without genuine intentions. Bumble's unique approach, with its rule that women and non-binary individuals must initiate the conversation, effectively combats this behavior and encourages more meaningful connections.

With Bumble, matches have a 24-hour expiration, discouraging endless swiping and promoting timely communication. Women taking the lead in starting conversations eliminates the mass "hey" messages that often flood other platforms. While men may feel pressure to initiate, Bumble fosters an environment where conversations can flow more naturally and authentically.

Beyond that, the app is pretty similar to Tinder, with some prompts and filters that keep things a step up from casual. Likely, you'll find a similar crowd here, but perhaps in this space, one more willing to chat and see where things go.

As for its paid options, Bumble is a bit on the pricey side but offers tiers with Boost and Premium(opens in a new tab), which allow you to go back to those profiles you accidentally left swiped on, extend matches (but only by another 24 hours), and use the advanced filters to your heart's content. It's really up to you if you want to spring for the extras since Bumble's free version is more than adequate to aid in the search for your someone. 

Who it's for:

Plenty of Fish (POF) is a bustling online dating platform that caters to a wide range of singles searching for love, connection, and everything in between. Whether you're a free-spirited soul seeking casual connections or someone ready to dive headfirst into a serious relationship, POF welcomes everyone with open arms.

Why we picked this:

POF has made a splash in online dating, not just because of its quirky name. With a proven track record of successful matches(opens in a new tab), POF has garnered a loyal following and has become a platform for many singles looking for love. (A close friend of mine found her husband on POF, and their journey from first message to "I do" is a testament to the potential for genuine connections found on the platform.)

What sets POF apart from other dating apps is its massive user base, which means you have an extensive pool of potential matches to explore. This diversity opens up endless possibilities, ensuring you can find someone who aligns with your dating preferences and relationship goals.

In addition to its impressive user base, POF's chat and messaging features provide a seamless platform for connecting with potential matches, making having a meaningful conversation and getting to know each other better much easier.

Who it's for:

SilverSingles is an online dating platform that caters to a specific demographic: mature singles aged 50 and above looking to make meaningful connections and companionship in their golden years.

While many dating apps focus on the younger generations, SilverSingles understands older adults' unique needs and desires. With a focus on compatibility and shared values, SilverSingles helps older singles find matches who are at a similar stage in life, ensuring a higher likelihood of long-term compatibility.

Why we picked this:

Dating over 50 means that, more than likely, this is your second or third attempt at love. When match or eharmony's user bases still pose too much of a never married, no-kids crowd, SilverSingles is here to let you know that putting yourself back out there during your golden years doesn't have to be scary. 

A sister site to EliteSingles, SilverSingles uses the same intense compatibility system that EliteSingles does, bringing in the popular big five personality traits(opens in a new tab) to assess five levels of your being: openness to experience, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism. Rather than overwhelming users with an endless sea of profiles, SilverSingles presents a curated selection of five handpicked matches per day, saving time and energy. Just be sure to pay attention to the locations of potential matches, though (like its sister site, SilverSingles has a habit of ignoring location radius preferences). 

While the site's personality test covers the essentials and offers a solid foundation for finding suitable partners, there's room for improvement in tailoring the experience to an older audience. Questions about having children or desiring more kids could be more nuanced to reflect the specific considerations of SilverSingles users. Even so, SilverSingles remains straightforward to navigate, providing a sense of familiarity for those seeking a mature and committed relationship.

Who it's for:

Coffee Meets Bagel is designed for singles who appreciate a more curated and personalized experience. Instead of overwhelming you with hundreds of options, Coffee Meets Bagel delivers a limited number of highly compatible matches, or "bagels," each day.

This thoughtful selection process takes into account your preferences, interests, and mutual connections, ensuring that the matches you receive are more aligned with your dating goals.

Why we picked this:

Grabbing coffee is the low-pressure date idea that lets you skip trying to choose a dressy-but-not-too-extra outfit for a concert or a restaurant. Coffee Meets Bagel is like the "grabbing coffee" version of dating apps, aiming to bring an easy-going atmosphere to folks who might just be a little rusty. 

Millions upon millions of active users is usually a plus. It is nice to know that your options are virtually limitless, but having 20 new messages to read every time you sign on is a bit jarring. This happens on eharmony and Tinder alike — people want connection, and they want it now. 

Every day, CMB offers seven of its best matches (bagels) for you, chosen by your answers to prompts, how you swiped on yesterday's batch, and who have already expressed interest in you. This slow and steady approach is great for singles who are rusty, introverted or don't feel like scrolling every free minute.

You're encouraged to get the ball rolling with matches disappearing in seven days. It's less pressure than Bumble's 24-hour time limit but still eliminates a list of people who don't care enough to respond or plan a meet-up. Like a few other apps, CMB won't show your profile to other users unless you have a clear picture, automatically filtering the whole section of faceless profiles you'll find on other apps. 

Another standout feature of CMB is the activity report at the bottom of everyone's profile. Though only available to premium users, it'll show a user's stats, like how often they're active and how long it takes them to reply.

Who it's for:

Tinder, the iconic dating app that ignited swipe culture, is the go-to platform for individuals seeking casual dating, fun encounters, and hookups. While you may not find someone looking to settle down for a while, Tinder isn't a bad place to be if you don't mind dating around or taking things slowly at first. Plus, with the app's new "Relationship Goals" feature, it's easier to suss out from a quick glance at someone's profile whether or not they'd be interested in something long-term.

Why we picked this:

Let's just get this one out of the way. If you're thinking of dating apps, you're thinking of Tinder. This app pioneered the now-ubiquitous swiping function, revolutionizing the world of online dating and boasting 1.6 billion swipes per day. What started out as a niche hookup app has turned into a wingman that most of us have used at least once in our life. As you're served a series of photos, swipe right if you like what you see and left if you don't. When you both indicate interest, it's a match.

Tinder may not want to advertise as such, but we all know what it's mostly used for. You're quite literally deciding if you want to interact with someone based on nothing but profile pictures and a quote from The Office — but hey, we all know those couples who met on Tinder and have been together for years. It's fast and easy, and if there's one app that even the shyest, most skeptical people will be on, it's Tinder. Sure, you may not find someone looking to settle down for a while, but if you don't mind dating around or taking things slow at first, Tinder isn't a bad place to be. Plus, with their new "Relationship Goals" feature, it's easier to suss out from a quick glance at someone's profile whether or not they'd be interested in something long-term.

Tinder is famously free, but fewer people know about its three tiers of paid upgrades: Tinder Plus, Tinder Gold(opens in a new tab), and Tinder Platinum. These include extras(opens in a new tab) like undoing a left swipe (bless), sending "Super Likes" to people you're really into, seeing which users have liked your profile (for Tinder Gold users), and even, in the case of Tinder Platinum, usurping the known rules of the app to message someone before you match with them.