Sex, Dating & Relationships
HBO

How to use ice cubes during foreplay like in 'The Idol'

Follow the expert advice, not what Tedros does in the scene.
By Anna Iovine  on 
the weeknd and lily-rose depp as tedros and jocelyn, respectively, in 'the idol'
Tedros used an ice cube during foreplay with Jocelyn on 'The Idol.' Credit: Eddy Chen/HBO

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In the first episode of Max's new series The Idol, club owner (and/or cult leader) Tedros (played by Abel "The Weeknd" Tesfaye) tells pop sensation Jocelyn (Lily-Rose Depp) that she needs to sing like she "knows how to fuck." He then rubs an ice cube down her leg and he inserts it where the audience can't see. 

By the next episode, Jocelyn takes a glass full of ice cubes and masturbates with it. 

It's not surprising, then, that Google searches for "ice cube sex" jumped 493 percent in the week after The Idol premiered, according to Google extension Glimpse:

graph showing increase in "ice cube sex" google searches
Google searches for "ice cube sex" have spiked due to 'The Idol.' Credit: Screenshot: Glimpse

In case you're searching the term yourself, experts told Mashable about the sexual act and how to do so safely.

What is temperature play?

What Tedros and Jocelyn were doing is called temperature play, or using hot or cold sensations to heighten one's experience in the bedroom. Some sex toys heat up, for example, while others can be popped into the fridge before use. In The Idol, characters use ice cubes for their sensation play. Temperature play can be a part of a BDSM scene, but it can be done without those dynamics as well.

The appeal of sensation play is that when we experience intense stimulation, our brain-body connection strengthens, explained sex educator and author All The F*cking Mistakes(opens in a new tab), Gigi Engle, in Mashable's guide to sensory play. "When we experience this kind of hyper-focus, we’re flooded with positive brain chemicals like oxytocin and endorphins," she said. "When this play is sexual, it can lead to deep erotic feelings."

"There are lots of reasons why you might want to experiment with ice cubes in the bedroom," said sex educator Danielle Bezalel, creator, executive producer, and host of the Sex Ed with DB(opens in a new tab) podcast. "If you're someone who's into experiencing different kinds of sensations during sex, temperature play with ice cubes can bring lots of excitement and arousal for you and your partner(s)."

Benefits of ice cube foreplay

Ice cubes create a contrast in temperature that heightens sensitivity, said sex and relationship expert at condoms.uk(opens in a new tab), Pippa Murphy, which can create a pleasurable sensation and increase arousal.

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Coldness adds an element of surprise, Murphy continued, and can increase anticipation for what's to come. This build-up of anticipation could lead to a stronger orgasm.

How to use ice cubes during foreplay or sex

Murphy recommends starting slowly and rubbing the ice cube on less sensitive areas of the body. Once you get comfortable, you can go for erogenous zones like nipples and thighs.

"You can try slowly gliding an ice cube down your partner's body from head to toe for extended foreplay, touching erogenous zones like the neck, nipples, hands, hips, and feet," Bezalel echoed. "You can try having an ice cube in your mouth while going down on your partner to engage some of their most sensitive parts."

While it's not shown explicitly on The Idol, it's implied that Tedros inserts an ice cube into Jocelyn. If you try this IRL, cover the ice cube in a condom or else there's a risk the cube can stick to the vaginal or anal walls, which can lead to burns, said Murphy.

As always, discuss consent and sexual boundaries with your partner.

If you're only using ice cubes outside one's body, on the skin, you can wrap the cube in a thin cloth if the ice alone is too much. 

As always, discuss consent and sexual boundaries with your partner. Know your and your partner's limits, said Bezalel. If your partner asks you to stop if the sensation doesn't feel good, stop. She suggests using one ice cube at a time to prevent sensory overload. If you want to test how ice cubes may feel, start with a small amount of cold water to work up to using ice cubes.

Don't follow the scene from The Idol to the letter when engaging in temperature play — but that advice pretty much goes for any HBO sex scene. Discuss your fantasies with your partner, go slow, and take it from there.

More in HBO, Sex

Anna Iovine is the sex and relationships reporter at Mashable, where she covers topics ranging from dating apps to pelvic pain. Previously, she was a social editor at VICE and freelanced for publications such as Slate and the Columbia Journalism Review. Follow her on Twitter @annaroseiovine(opens in a new tab).


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